Update <3

So, once again I have been quiet for a long time and I want to let you know what’s happening.
I’ll start by saying that despite appearances, love this comic very much. It was my darling project and the most important part of my life for many years, second only to my wife.

As some of you know, neither me or her are, or will ever be, in good health. We’ve always been happy together, but we’ve also always had a difficult time making ends meet and staying on top of all the practicalities that make up a life.
Since I discovered my disabilities and grew to see and accept just how limited my own resources are, I’ve gone through a long period of mourning as I forced myself to understand that my dreams of creating stories were unattainable.

I can’t make this comic. I love it so much, and I am so, so grateful that anyone read it and thought it worth their time. All the shares, likes and words of encouragement have warmed my heart.

I’ve worked so hard on it and cared so deeply about it and unfortunately that’s not enough. I mean, I care about myself and work hard to stay alive and some days that’s not enough for me to remember to eat, drink and crap, so it’s not strange. Whatever power I have left after taking care of myself has to go to my wife, to making our lives easier and learning and growing and doing everything I can to become a more capable person.

I’ve been avoiding writing this because I wanted to hold out hope I could put the comic on hiatus instead of abandoning it and I’m sorry I’ve ghosted my readers while I put off making a hard decision. I’ve been very sad (and I am sad now) but as I’m typing this I don’t feel like my words are especially tragic on the whole. In the long run I know I’ll be happier with a modest life than chasing dreams that even abled and healthy people struggle to attain.

Since I stopped drawing and writing I’ve been creative in other ways and made some very weird AIP snacks and some truly ugly, but very allergy-safe cushions. I’ve learned how to clean a kitchen – I am now a person with a kitchen that is usually clean – and honestly I’m bursting with pride because I never thought that would ever happen!

It’s a painful journey but I’m making big strides and try as I might I can’t help picture every now and then a future in which I have come far enough to make consistent work on a creative project manageable.

If it comes, and soon enough, I hold out hope that all our cuts and bruises can finally be shared with you in some form. If not, I will always treasure the world I created and hope that Tony and Rob have a good time somewhere out there in the multiverse even without my dubious care 🙂

Thank you all so, so much for everything.